Another Way
by seashell118
Summary: Jasper Whitlock just can't see himself any other way: he's a monster. Even after escaping the south, he can't seem to get away from his horrible depression. But then he meets Alice... need I say more?
1. Chapter 1

**Disclaimer: Jasper and Peter are the figments of Stephenie Meyer's amazing imagination; Jennie is my own little creation.  
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**I leaned against a telephone pole on the dark road. I appeared to be people-watching. In reality, I was condemning one of these people to death.

It was utter chaos in my head; so many people were rushing down the snow-covered street, all with different emotions. I felt each of them, in turn, as they hurried by, eager to enter one of the warm shops that lined the road and finish their Christmas shopping.

There was a young woman who appeared to be alone. I focused on her, following her every movement. She was fifty yards away, maybe, and I could still see the pulse thudding in her neck. Venom flowed through my mouth.

She was calm, more controlled than the others. I liked that. Maybe it would make this easier. Not for her, for me.

I crossed the street, avoiding eye contact with the many who desperately tried to meet my gaze. It was hard enough not to massacre the whole street when I was this thirsty _without_ every woman hopefully staring in my direction. Humans were such idiotic creatures. If something was pretty, they wanted it. And to them, I was quite appealing. They had no idea how appealing they all were to me. Not their looks: their smells.

My hands balled up as I remembered another life, a past life: three impossibly beautiful women, and me willing to do anything for them… a bite on the neck….

But I controlled myself, not breathing and desperately trying not to think, pointedly staring at the girl in the red jacket I had spied from across the road. She glanced up, meeting my gaze, then down again. Up, down, up down; it was comical, really. Her face flushed the same delicious shade of red as her jacket.

"Hello," I greeted her musically. "My name is Jasper Whitlock."

She blushed further as I spoke. "I'm Jennie, Jennie Bright," she managed to stammer out.

I smiled alluringly, extending my hand. She shook it, but wasn't bothered by the cold temperature. It was about six degrees; everything was cold.

"Do you need help carrying your bags?" I asked her, gesturing towards the bundles in plastic shopping bags in her hands.

"Oh, erm, sure," she breathed. I smiled again and took the heaviest ones out of her arms. Heavy to her; to me, it was the same as carrying bags of feathers.

"Where are you going now?" I asked.

She blushed again, and the venom coated my tongue in response. "My- my car," she stammered. I nodded, and then inclined my head for her to lead the way.

The parking lot was full of cars, though empty of other humans. This was working out better than I planned. She opened her trunk in silence; she was embarrassed, anxious for my approval of her. The feelings rolled off her body in waves, and I scowled. I had hoped that her calm demeanor before would last. I was wrong.

She looked up at me as I placed her packages in the trunk, and flinched at my venomous expression; I hastily reassembled my features. She was slightly appeased, but nervous now. Crap.

"This may be a bit forward of me, but would you like to take a walk?" I heard her heart hammer in her chest.

"Of course," she whispered.

We strolled down the dark lot. It was only when we were passed the cars, nearing the dark woods, that I started to feel her confusion.

"Where are we going?" she asked me.

"Nowhere in particular. I just wanted an excuse to be alone with you." That much was true, at least.

Jennie smiled, blushing again; how much longer could I take this?

"Why do you want to be alone with me?" she asked. I recognized her look as she stared at me under her eyelids; she was flirting with me. I almost laughed, but controlled myself at the last second.

I stepped closer to her. Her anxiety increased, though no longer because she was scared of me. She wanted me. I wanted her, too, but for very different reasons.

"You look simply delicious," I purred.

She took a step back, raising one eyebrow. I could feel her disgust; I controlled it, transforming it into lust. She stepped closer to me.

"Trust me," I whispered as I put my lips to her neck. I opened my mouth, savoring the taste of her flesh. But I was thirsty, the back of my throat alight with flames. I couldn't take it anymore.

I bit down.

In a flash, my hand was over her mouth to muffle her scream; I tried to control her horrified senses, to make her feel safe, but my venom was in her now, and there was no controlling the pain she was in. I gave up, savoring the taste of her blood, instead. I tried to ignore not just her screams that I continued to muffle, but the feelings hitting me with astounding force: pain, fear, that desperate urge to flee, the realization that she was dying.

I couldn't ignore it all, but I tried anyway.

Eventually, her screams and feelings grew weaker, and then died altogether. I continued to drain her body until the last drop, the thirst controlling my every move. Only when she was white, lifeless, and empty did I feel the disgust.

I was a monster. I was a hideous murderer, and I couldn't stop myself from killing. I would kill again. I would never be able to stop.

I dug into the dirt with my bare hands, furiously throwing it behind me, trying to use my anger to dig ever deeper. A few feet later, I flung the lifeless corpse into the impromptu grave.

As I refilled the hole, I whispered, over and over again, "Please, God, let her into Heaven, please, don't let her go to Hell, please, please, please." It was the least I could do for this woman I had just killed. I prayed over every one of my victims. I never prayed for my own salvation. I didn't deserve one.

Peter found me there, curled into a ball, after he had finished his own kill.

"Jasper, what's with you?" he asked me, giving me a hand up.

"I could _feel_ her, Peter. She was scared, and I still killed her. Oh, God," I whispered.

"Really, Jazz, get a grip on yourself! This is how we survive. They are our prey. End of story."

I took in a deep breath. "I think I need to go on my own, for now. I need to do something, to find another way."

Peter put a gentle arm on my shoulder. "Move on if you'd like. Charlotte and I will miss you, but we won't stop you. But there is no other way, Jasper, and when you realize that, we will welcome you back with open arms."

I nodded, unable to say anything more. He pitied me, I felt it. But I needed to find another way.

But what Peter said was true: there was no other way. I was condemned to this life, forever.

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	2. Chapter 2

"I'm sorry," I whispered, filling the makeshift grave with dirt. "So, so sorry, but everything will be okay now, please God, let everything be okay." I kept up my guilty murmuring for several minutes, even after the hole was full.

Another death. That made eight in the last two months alone. How many others had I killed? Not just humans, but my kind, too.

The fact that I didn't know made me physically sick.

The moon shone brightly down through the bare branches in the woods. Shadows were cast everywhere. It was so easy to lure this human here, far too easy. And she had tasted so good…

I let out a cry, hating myself for enjoying her death. Panting heavily, I tried to sort out the chaos in my mind.

I was definitely happier now that I was out of the south. I had made my way toward Pennsylvania unconsciously, desperate to reach the northern territories, which were more civilized in my mind. Peter and Charlotte were doing fine; this life didn't bother them in the slightest.

But I was troubled; more than that, I was intensely depressed. It was bad enough that I was a murderer, but what made it worse was that everything my prey was feeling, I felt. With every satisfactory meal I lost another part of myself. Was I really less of a monster now? I still murdered. I still fed on human blood.

And there was no way to stop. It was a vicious circle.

After saying a prayer over the dead girls body, I walked out of the woods into the street. It was in the very early hours of the morning; two o'clock, maybe. I had lost track of time. There were no cars on the street. It was empty.

How could I take myself out of human company? That had to be the only way to feed less, if I wasn't tempted as much. I needed a home, that's it. I looked up, finding myself in front of a rather fine hotel. It could work.

Of course, this wouldn't make the scent weaker, being around so many humans, but I could lock myself up to remind myself of what I wanted to do.

The hotel was closed, so I waited in the shadows. I stood as still as a statue for several hours, watching as the sun gradually rose over the horizon. I was safe from it's beams, but it still made me nervous. I didn't like being outside during the day.

Finally, the doors to the hotel opened, and I waltzed in. The humans at the front desk were bound to be startled by my brilliant crimson eyes, but there was nothing I could do about that now.

"Hello," I greeted them. "I'm going to need a room."

I paid for it with the credit card that I had taken from the wallet of my last kill. Her last sacrifice to me.

I barricaded myself in my room for three days before the complications started to arise.

Usually, I didn't need to hunt for two weeks or so, but one human didn't fill me enough. Already my eyes were darkening near the pupils. But it was still remotely bearable, until the fateful knock.

To spend the time, I closed my eyes and listened to the sounds around me; the television in the room next door; the baby who wouldn't fall asleep two floors down; the rumble of a vending machine down the hall. It wasn't interesting in the slightest, but it was something to concentrate on, rather than the delicious smells wafting in every direction.

Then, she knocked.

But first, let me explain something. There is a reason that women are my prey, more often than not. It's so much easier to trap them, for my beauty stuns their mind. Men are not as apt to follow me into darkness. After a while, women just became associated with food in my mind. It's not sexism. It's just a connection my brain makes.

So, if the knocker had been a male, would it have been the same? I didn't know. But the fact is, it was a woman, and that's where things started to fall apart.

Knock, knock. "Maid service."

I would have answered instantly, except the smell that was wafting through the crack between the door and the floor was simply… _incredible._ I didn't trust myself to open my mouth.

Spending my years cloaked in night and surrounded by my own kind, I momentarily forgot the fact that, if I didn't ask her to leave, she would come right in. I only recalled this when I heard the click of the lock. And then it was too late.

"I'm sorry, sir, I'll come back later," she said to me, not meeting my eyes.

My jaw trembled with the force that I was exerting to keep it shut; my dual-colored eyes twitched; my body bent low into a crouch. It was so fast I doubt she even saw any of it.

"Get out of my room!" I roared.

She could not do this! She could not break my self-control!

I didn't see her as an innocent human. She was a devil's temptress, seducing me into the dark ways I was trying to leave behind.

I pounced, grabbing her roughly. Too roughly—I heard the crack as one of her bones broke. She screamed, but only for half a second before my hand was on her mouth.

"No! No, no, no!" I shouted, with the force of an atom bomb.

I swiftly ran over to the window, pulling it open easily despite the fact that it was nailed shut.

And then I threw her out.

It only took me three quarters of a second to regret my decision; I swiftly grabbed her by the ankle and dragged her back into the room. She was too shocked to speak, so I took advantage of her silence, knocking her out with a flick of my finger.

I quietly exited my room, down the stairs to the front desk.

"I think one of the maids has had an accident, room 317. She hit her head pretty hard. I think she may have a concussion."

And then I walked out.

So, I may not have killed that woman. But I hurt her. Not just physically, but emotionally. What will she do when no one believes her when she wakes up? They will say that she hit her head, the nice man she claimed to have thrown her out a window gratefully called for help.

But she would always know the truth, and so would I.

Thank goodness there was a storm brewing outside; it was raining heavily, clouds obscuring the sky. The last thing I needed was to sparkle in a thirty-mile-per-hour zone.

I crossed the street swiftly, unsure as to what to do. Even though there was no sun, I didn't like being out during the day. It wasn't natural, not for my kind. I spied a diner across the street, and made my way toward it.

I opened the door, a small bell signaling my arrival. Instantly, I knew that this was the wrong place to have come.

It was half-filled with humans. Their scent hit me like a wrecking ball. I stood stock still, not breathing. But wait—there had been another scent, too. Something familiar yet foreign….

"Are you in or you out, sonny?" a heavyset human woman called from behind the counter, a filthy rag in her hair. The fluorescent lighting didn't flatter her.

I was about to tell her I was out when the one person sitting at the counter spun around on her stool to face me.

She had inky black hair that was cropped short, and dark eyes that accented her pale face. She was smiling, showing off her perfect, pearly-white teeth.

She was where the smell originated, the familiar yet unfamiliar one. I recognized it because she was a vampire; but couldn't place it because we had never met before.

But I had no time to ponder this, because she was hopping off the stool and coming closer to me. That meant only one thing: an attack. I bent low into a crouch, waiting for her to strike.


	3. Chapter 3

I straightened up in a quarter of a second, before human eyes could detect the movement.

She didn't seem to be attacking, she was… smiling. And her emotions, they were beyond words. There were standard ones that I felt from others everyday: relief, excitement; but there were others, some I'd never felt before. Happiness was among them, genuine happiness. I've never been happy, but I'd felt other people's content before. It couldn't compare. And there was another emotion, one that was completely foreign to me. I couldn't even begin to put a name on it.

"You've kept me waiting a long time," she scolded me good naturedly.

I had no idea what she meant, but my southern instincts were drilled too deeply in me to do anything else but apologize. "I'm sorry, ma'am," I said, ducking my head.

The strange girl smiled again as I looked up. Her eyes were darker than mine, but she seemed completely at ease here among the humans.

She extended her hand, and I didn't hesitate to take it. The emotions I felt before were stronger now, strengthened by the physical contact.

Suddenly, I was able to name what that foreign emotion was: hope.

And that's when I found meaning in this life. That's when I knew that, somehow, it was all going to be okay. As long as this strange girl was with me, I would be able to go through whatever life threw at me.

"My name is Alice Brandon," the strange girl announced as we left the diner, hand in hand. I refused to let go. I tried to tell myself it was only to have her emotions strengthened so that I could feel vicariously happy through her happiness, but I wasn't fooling anyone, not even me.

"Nice to meet you, Miss Brandon. My name is Jasper Whitlock."

"Oh, I know," she said, brushing my reply off with a wave of her free hand.

My brow furrowed. "How do you know?"

"I have a certain gift to see the future. It's not perfect, and I'm still getting used to it, but it seems to be working so far." Her mouth puckered. "I wish it could tell me times, though. I've been waiting for you forever. I thought you were never going to show up."

I laughed, the first time I could ever remember doing so. "I'm sorry. I didn't know you were waiting for me."

"Well, we're together now, and that's all that matters." My mind soared as she said this, and a feeling I didn't recognize coursed through my very being. Strange. I'd thought myself some kind of emotion connoisseur, and then this girl shows up, this Alice, showing me how little I actually knew of the world.

"Where are we going, exactly?" I asked, though it didn't matter much. As long as she didn't let go of my hand.

"There's a family that lives in Washington that we are going to join," she said, matter-of-factly.

I cocked my head to one side, deciding the idea was fine with me. "A family?"

"Yes. I don't think coven is the right word. There are five of them, and they don't drink the blood of humans."

I stopped in my tracks. "_What?_"

She rolled her eyes. "I saw that you were going to react this way. Let me explain. Carlisle Cullen, he's the leader of them, the father, if you will, he started this whole theory of drinking animal blood instead of human. His mate's name is Esme—are you writing this down, or something? You should remember this, we're going to be a part of the family soon. Then there's Rosalie and Emmett, and finally Edward, who doesn't have a mate yet."

She chattered on and on as I listened in amazement. Edward liked music; she'd seen that she was going to buy him a new stereo. Carlisle was a doctor; he worked at the hospital in the town they lived in. Esme liked to renovate houses. Rosalie was vain, but we would all get around fine. Emmett was strong, very strong, and funny. They lived in this gorgeous house near a small town called Forks, with a glass wall in the back. She wondered aloud how she would get Edward to give her his room: it had the best view. On and on she chattered, and I listened with a rapt expression.

"I've already got us plane tickets," she announced as we entered a large building; I hadn't realized how far we had traveled as I listened to her. I doubted I would have noticed if we had never stopped, as long as she kept talking.

"We're going on a plane?" I asked uneasily. I didn't like planes: they recycled the same air, over and over again, with the scent of human so close in such cramped quarters…

"Don't worry, you'll be able to control yourself," she said confidently, and I realized she must have had a vision.

We passed through security and then boarded the plane, all the while talking about our new life. However, on the plane, she asked about my old life. I wasn't grateful for the subject change, but the humans were so close, and I needed to distract myself.

"I was changed by a woman named Maria," I told her. "I was a major in the Confederate Army, at the time. Maria was building her own army, though, an army of newborns. The pain was… excruciating. But you'll know all about that."

"Actually, no," she replied.

"How can you not remember?"

"I don't remember my human life at all. Nothing!" Her lips formed a pout, and nothing was more beautiful. "I don't even remember who transformed me, or the pain, or anything. I woke up alone. I didn't know what was going on, but I started to have visions of you, and I knew it was going to be okay. Once I decided to go find you, I started to see the Cullen family, that we would join them." She smiled, and squeezed my hand.

Knowing that she had no memories, I plunged into my human memories with as much vigor as I could muster. Humans couldn't hear me, of course, but Alice listened attentively.

"I was only seventeen when I joined the Confederate Army. I was a skilled fighter and had a cunning mind. Now that I've been changed, though, I realize it must have been something more. I can manipulate emotions," I explained to her puzzled face. "My father always thought it was charisma.

And then Maria and two others found me one night, and I was changed." I didn't go into detail about the pain; that was one memory I was glad she didn't have. I instantly wanted to protect her. It was like a reflex, an instinct.

"We fought other newborn armies for a long time; I'm not sure how long. Time ceased to have meaning for me. Maria eventually put me in charge of the newborns as I got older instead of destroying me with the others." I shivered, remembering how many others I myself had condemned to death. "It was then that I met Peter and his mate, Charlotte. They ran away, and Peter came back a while later and convinced me to join him. I'd never known there was another way to live except the savage existence I had. It was like a kind of heaven," I said, my voice souring toward the end.

"But it became too much for me. I can manipulate emotions, but I can also feel them. I've felt the pain of dying each and every time I fed on a human. It was maddening." I fell silent, not willing to go on.

"So, that's were all these scars are from. The vampire fighting," she whispered to herself, tracing one over my left eyebrow. I fell silent, memorizing the feel of her touch. Her dark eyes met mine, and I wondered to myself if she had ever hunted. She was a newborn, after all.

I could have stayed like that for hours, forever, even, but the plane landed at that very moment. We straightened up, getting ready to leave. She was feeling as perfectly blissful as I was, and that made me even happier. We were on the same page; we were one. It was like we were made for each other.

Once out of the dismal airport, I took a deep breath; the smell of vegetation and rain along with other things greeted me. It was evening, but clouds pressed heavily against the sky, hiding the setting sun.

"It's strange, being out during the day," I mused. Alice took my hand to comfort me.

And then she started running, still holding my hand. I let her lead me off to our new life.


	4. Chapter 4

**I hope you guys are having as much fun reading this as I am writing it!**

**Disclaimer: Still not Stephenie Meyer. Dang.**

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**We were about a two miles from where Alice assured me the house would be before I got nervous. _Everything's going to be okay, everything's going to be okay._ I couldn't even believe the words I chanted in my mind.

"What if they don't want us to come?" I asked her, poorly concealing my anxiety.

"Of course they want us to come. I've already seen them accepting us into the family." She was confident in this, and I didn't question her again.

When we reached the long driveway, I had to pause. We had been running for a few hours; I didn't feel tired, of course, I was just scared.

"Alice, maybe this isn't a good idea," I murmured. "We shouldn't intrude on their life."

She squeezed my hand comfortingly. "Don't worry. Everything's going to be okay." Somehow, coming from her, I found truth in the words that I couldn't accept on my own.

We walked at human pace to the front door to give the Cullens a heads up on our arrival. My stone-solid body seemed to have the consistency of feathers. I had never been so nervous in my entire life, not even when Maria and I had almost been overtaken in one of our wars in the South. No, this was a different kind of nervousness: my entire humanity, if I even had any left, balanced on whether this family would take me in.

There was no break in the trees, but my capable eyes could see through the gloom. No one was outside, though I could feel their tension as they sensed our arrival. I gulped loudly. No doubt they were able to hear that all the way in the house.

"Calm down, Jasper," Alice whispered soothingly to me before knocking on the door. She had barely made contact with the wood before it swung open.

There were three vampires standing in the doorway, two females and a male. I quickly appraised them all.

The male was physically older than I, though I had no idea just how long he had been alive. He had blonde hair and a calming presence that surprised me. I instantly understood that he was the leader of this coven, this 'family'. Carlisle, Alice had called him.

He had a firm, protective hold on a woman standing next to him, who I took to be his mate, Esme. She had caramel colored hair and wide, innocent eyes. Her anxiety was hard to miss, though it was nothing compared to mine.

The last was another female, blonde, intimidating, and stunningly beautiful, even for our kind. Her lips were pursed and her arms crossed tightly across her stone chest. Rosalie.

They all had strange, golden eyes.

"Hello, Carlisle!" Alice greeted the leader warmly. She held out her hand to the astonished man. "It's nice to finally meet you! And this must be Esme!" She turned her attention to the now-shocked woman. "And Rosalie, of course," she said, inclining her head. "You're even more beautiful in person. So, which rooms can we have?"

All three vampires appeared to be choking.

I felt it all: fear, anxiety, suspicion, shock, and bewilderment. I wasn't surprised. These were all the things that I had felt when I met Alice for the first time. But the suspicion and fear was also aimed at me, and it wasn't hard to guess why. My entire body was coated in a mosaic of bite marks. I practically screamed danger.

"Maybe you should slow down, Alice," I warned her, soothing everyone in the room with my talent. Carlisle raised his eyebrows at me, and I grinned sheepishly.

"It seems that we have a lot to learn about each other." He paused, thinking something over in his head. "Or rather, we have a lot to learn about you."

I smiled, taking Alice's hand again. She smiled shyly, but her eyes were still bright and excited. "Sorry," she apologized. "I can get a bit ahead of myself. It's just so great to finally meet you all!" She squealed loudly, encompassing Carlisle in a tight hug. I held back my laughter as he raised his arms, eyes widened in shock, confusion radiating off his body. Still, he patted Alice slightly on the back.

"Alice," I warned again. She skipped back.

"So where are Edward and Emmett?"

"They're… hunting." Rosalie's reply was cold. Unease and distrust; her feelings were easy to decipher. I wouldn't trust us either if the situation were reversed.

"Would you care to explain how you know so much about us?" Carlisle asked patiently, though I could sense his burning curiosity behind the inquiry.

We all sat down on the couches in the living room.

"My name is Alice Brandon," Alice began. "I don't know where I come from or who changed me. I woke up alone in Mississippi, and I have no memories of my human life."

If our hosts were shocked before, it was nothing compared to now.

"Nothing? You can't even remember a small detail?" Carlisle prodded.

Alice shook her head. "Nothing at all. But when I woke up, I saw Jasper's face," she said, squeezing my hand, "And then I saw all of you. I knew I would become one of your family one day, so I found Jasper and came straight here."

"How did you see these things?" Carlisle asked.

"I have a gift for seeing the future. I don't know much about it, but it's seemed to have proven itself so far."

"Have you had any other visions?"

"A few," Alice admitted. "They were very small ones. They were mainly about Jasper's reactions to the things I would say to him."

"What did you tell him?" Carlisle asked.

"I told him what I saw. I told him about you and Esme and Rosalie and Emmett and Edward, and I told him that you don't hunt humans."

"And you saw all of this?" Carlisle's awe was profound. Five minutes and she already owned him; I repressed a chuckle. What a little monster I had on my hands.

"Yes," Alice responded proudly.

"So what's your story, dear?" Esme asked, directing her question to me. I was uneasy; but I trusted this strange coven.

I told them about my beginnings, my transformation with Maria, and then all of the fights in the south. Their faces became grave at this, though only Rosalie judged me, and by the sound of Alice's descriptions of her, I expected no less. I briefly explained the depression I was in until I met Alice, and that I followed her here.

"You have been through a great deal, and I'm sorry that you have had to do so," Carlisle said when I finished. I was grateful.

"Of course, you will all be accepted into the family," Esme said motherly. I still didn't understand the use of the word family, though I could obviously see that this coven was different than the others I had seen. They were stronger, bonded to each other with something I couldn't fathom.

"Perfect!" Alice cried. "Can we pick out our rooms?"

Esme laughed. "Of course."

Alice grabbed my hand, tugging me up the stairs at warp speed. She passed the hallway without a glance, already heading to her target up another flight of stairs.

The room she brought me too was already lived in. Although there was no bed, there was a massive CD collection and a slightly outdated stereo. The room was decorated sparsely. It reminded me of a prison cell.

"Whose room is this?" I whispered. I didn't feel safe speaking louder. Of course, Alice did; she answered in a normal tone.

"Edward's. He's a horrible decorator, but I can make do with this. Look at the view!" She tugged my hand over to the glass wall which overlooked a small meadow in the backyard, a lake and mountains visible in the distance.

"It is beautiful," I murmured, placing one arm around her waist. She beamed.

"So I'll take this room, then," Alice said confidently.

"Wait—I thought you said this was Edward's?"

A mischievous smile spread across her lips. "Oh, it is. But he'll forgive me, eventually."

I laughed as she continued to pack the room up, and I helped her, hoping this Edward fellow wouldn't be too offended. Esme watched with worried eyes.

"I don't know if this is the best idea," she mused anxiously.

"Don't worry, Esme, Edward will be fine once he sees his new room!"

"New room?"

"Oh, yes. As a thank-you-and-don't-kill-me-for-taking-your-space present."

Esme's face alighted; she adored remodeling things. Alice was keen on fashion, and they both went into a discussion of color schemes and furniture while I put all of Edward's belongings in the garage.

I ran into Carlisle as I passed upstairs again; he was coming out of a room filled with books and paintings.

"I hear Alice has claimed her territory," he said with a slight smile.

"She does that a lot," I said, chuckling.

Carlisle gestured to a room down the hall. "That room is empty; we mainly use it for storage. You're welcome to it, if you like."

I nodded. "Thank you so much—for everything."

He placed his hand on my shoulder. "You deserve it, my son." I glowed under the praise, regressing to a five year old, but not caring in the slightest.

"We're going to have to think of a story about you two," he continued, frowning.

"A story?"

"Yes. We all have cover stories. Currently, Esme and I have adopted Edward and Emmett, and Rosalie is our foster child. So far we have put out that they are home-schooled, but they might join the local high-school in a few years."

I nodded. "I'm sure we can think of something."

Carlisle smiled. "Of course."

He left me so that I could get settled, though I had no belongings. I took the random articles out of the room; remnants of their past, trinkets they gathered up here and there during their existence. I placed them in the living room, not wanting to have them gathering dust in the garage.

Alice was in her element.

"Oh Jasper, now I have three rooms to decorate! Mine, Edward's, and yours! This is going to be so much fun!" Even in the short time I'd known her, I'd never seen her as happy as now.

"We'll need to hunt soon, of course, but then we can get started."

I smiled at her. "Anything you want."

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**What did you think? Tell me in comments! There's a whole shiny green button just for you!**

**Also: Should I continue with one-shots of Jasper through the years after I finish the main story?**

** ie. random days at Forks High, the hunt for James, Bella's papercut?**

**Or should I just do Rosalie's story?**

**If you have time, check out my other stories: Dreams and Preparations and Invisible.  


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	5. Chapter 5

**Disclaimer: None of these characters, settings, or plot lines are mine. I am most definitely not Stephenie Meyer, and that makes me a little sad inside.

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I had been a major in the Confederate Army, a soldier and then a general in an incredibly vicious newborn vampire army, traveled all over the country in a matter of weeks with Peter and Charlotte, and I had never, ever been this tired.

My kind was made for physical exertion. We didn't get physically tired. Only something near torture could have made me feel as weak as this.

"Alice, remind me to never, ever go shopping with you again," I moaned as we got home. It had been another cloudy day in Forks, and Esme and Alice opted to start their redecorating. I didn't fancy the idea of staying home without Alice, so I tagged along.

Big mistake.

We spent all morning, afternoon, and most of the evening traveling from store to store, picking out carpets and curtains and couches and paint cans. Alice was unstoppable.

She grinned, flicking my nose. "Don't be silly. It will be better next time."

"Next time!" I groaned in mock horror. She giggled, picking up a black leather couch with one hand.

We loaded the new things into the respective rooms, and then Esme shooed us out.

"Go hunting," she suggested, gesturing at our dark eyes. "I'll take it from here."

It had been hard being around so many humans today, so I didn't argue with her. Grabbing Alice's hand, we ran downstairs into the yard.

We didn't stop running until we reached the river visible from Alice's window.

"One, two, three!" Alice counted, and then we jumped. It felt like I was flying. It was incredible. Definitely better than running.

The new food source, though, was going to be a problem.

"You cannot honestly expect me to drink _that_," I said, wrinkling my nose. The stench coming from the deer was horrible.

Alice gave me a look, and I fell silent, focusing on my revolting prey.

I stood, still as a statue, not making a move or sound. The deer were smart, though. They sensed the danger and stayed a hundred yards away or so. I didn't move.

And then, quick as a flash, I jumped the distance easily, pouncing on two deer at once.

It was nothing like drinking human blood. For one, I couldn't feel the animal's emotions, so that was a plus. It didn't feel like murder: I had eaten meat in my human life, how was this any different? But the taste… it would take some getting used to. I didn't feel as deeply satisfied as I usually did after feeding. The difference was barely perceptible, but I was a military man. Anything that made me feel even the slightest bit weaker rang warning bells in my head.

But this was the only way. The only way to keep from being a monster. The only way to keep Alice. Surprisingly, it was that fact more than anything that made me so determined to stick to this diet. I wanted to stay with Alice. I needed her.

Alice was finished feeding before I was, and she waited patiently for me at the edge of the trees. She smiled brightly when I joined her, giving me the sensation that my body was melting. Her eyes were a different color now: gold, the same as the rest of the Cullens. I realized that the animal blood must do this, and that mine must be the same color as hers.

"Ready to go back inside?" she asked before taking my hand.

I nodded. "Let's go."

Esme, who seemed to have bonded with Alice during the day's events, quickly sucked her up into the redecorating vortex. This time I was smart, and kept away.

I meandered around the house alone, surprised at how lost I felt without Alice by my side. I mulled over what this meant in my mind, not really paying attention to where my feet were taking me.

"What are you doing?" a voice hissed at me.

I looked up, surprised, into Rosalie's vicious face.

"Nothing," I answered honestly. She flared her nostrils in disbelief.

She started walking away, but I called after her. "You don't trust me." It wasn't a question, simply a statement of fact. Rosalie froze, then spun around slowly to face me.

"No, I don't."

"Why is that?"

"You mean you don't know?" she asked. The venom in her voice would make a weaker man cringe. My features were perfectly smooth.

"I only feel your emotions, I don't know the reasons behind them," I explained calmly.

She clicked her tongue. "Guess you'll need Edward for that then."

"Edward?"

She let out a vindictive chuckle. "Didn't your mate tell you? Or did she not even know? Edward can read minds."

"I did know!" Alice called indignantly from upstairs. "I just didn't want to freak you out, Jasper!" I smiled, knowing that she was sticking her tongue out even though I couldn't see her.

"Whatever," Rosalie snorted. "You want to know the reason? I don't trust you because you're dangerous. You're one of those murderous leeches I hoped to leave behind in my human life, and you'll be the one to give us all away."

I stood still, stunned. She walked away, and I didn't stop her this time.

I couldn't deny anything she said. I was a murderer. I could barely reign in my self control. Would I be the one to give this family away?

"It's not true, Jasper, don't listen to her." Alice was beside me in an instant. I didn't hear her arrival, but I felt her hand reach up to the back of my neck.

"Come on," she said. "Let's go for a walk."

I was silent as she led me outside. Once we were out of hearing range, she stopped.

"Tell me what's going on." It wasn't a request.

"I don't think I can stay here, Alice," I said quietly. "I'm no good for this family—I'm no good for you."

"Don't you dare say that," she hissed. I was surprised; I had never seen this side of her before. "You are the best person I've ever met, Jasper Whitlock, and you shouldn't listen to a word Rosalie says. She doesn't understand."

"But she's right. I can't control myself. What if I'm the one who gives us all away?"

"You won't be," Alice said confidently, but I was already shaking my head.

"You don't know that, not yet."

She put her hand on my face, and her tawny eyes were serious, all hints of her quirky self gone. "No matter what you do, I will always love you, Jasper."

I put my hand on hers, not removing it from my cheek.

"I love you too, Alice," I whispered. She smiled, standing up on her tiptoes to kiss me.

"Now let's end this nonsense," she said firmly, but her tone was lighter than before. "You won't let anything stop you from staying here with me—got that?"

I grinned. "Yes, ma'am."

She smiled back, but her eyes suddenly glazed over.

"Alice? Alice what is it?" I asked her fearfully, gripping her shoulders.

She came back to earth, smiling devilishly.

"Edward and Emmett will be back in approximately twenty-six minutes. And he is _not_ going to be happy."

I laughed. "I hope you've got a plan up your sleeve."

"I always do," she replied before kissing me again.

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	6. Chapter 6

**So, here it is! The chapter that you've all been waiting for!**

**Oh, again: I am in no way, shape, or form Stephenie Meyer. But it would be super cool if I was.**

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I felt their tension before they arrived. No doubt Edward and Emmett could smell us all the way from the highway. At least, Edward could probably already be reading our minds. I peeked over at Alice, and her eyes were closed. She was obviously concentrating very hard on something.

"What are you doing?" I asked her.

"I'm trying to convince Edward that we're friends," she muttered out of the corner of her mouth.

"It's not working. He's pretty anxious."

She frowned. "You're not helping."

"Sorry."

For all Alice's confidence before, she was pretty tense now.

I heard the engine of a car stop around the corner of the house, in the garage. Too late, I remembered that all of Edwards's belongings were in there. Oops.

But the door opened then, the two unknown vampires rushing into the front room. One of them was quite large; from Alice's descriptions, I easily identified him as Emmett. His windswept curly black hair was falling into his eyes, and he brushed it away with one of his massively muscular arms.

I assumed the other to be Edward. He had tousled bronze hair, and was incredibly tense. His golden eyes were hard as stone, his jaw set tight.

Automatically, I soothed the tension of the room, bringing a wave of calm upon every one.

"Who are you?" Edward asked both of us, his suspicious tone marred by his abrupt calmness.

"My name is Alice, and this is Jasper. We're here to join the family!" Alice chimed cheerfully. I nodded, my hand around her waist protectively.

"Carlisle?" Edward turned to his 'father' for confirmation.

"It's true, Edward. They mean no harm."

Rosalie appeared on the top of the stairs. "Emmett, you're home," she said cheerfully. I was abruptly taken aback. Rosalie—being _nice?_

Edward glared at me; I remembered he could read minds and that I was insulting his sister. I shrugged, letting no trace of emotion escape me, although I was embarrassed. I didn't want him to see my weakness; it was a military strategy. Assume a strong front, no matter what.

"Why are my things in the garage?" Edward hissed.

"Oh, Alice and I are redecorating your room," Esme explained, with a wink at the subject of her statement.

Edward saw the sly communication between the two, and then rushed up the stairs. I heard a thunderous growl of frustration.

"My room is _pink_!" he cried deafeningly.

"No, my room is pink. Yours is gold," Alice called up to him.

Edward appeared at the top of the stairs. His glare was murderous. "I was just in my room. It's pink."

"Oh, about that. We've traded rooms."

I thought his eyes were going to bug straight out of their sockets. "You—but--." He seemed to be incapable of stringing a sentence together. Abruptly, Edward closed his eyes, taking a deep breath through his nose. "Where is my room, then?" Without an answer, he trudged back down the hallway. I assumed he saw the answer in one of our thoughts.

"C'mon!" Alice hissed to me excitedly. Of course, her enthusiasm affected me and I was suddenly eager to see Edward's new room, too.

Edward was standing stock-still in the doorway. The shock was radiating off his body in waves. I could just see over his head, and I gasped.

The room's walls were completely covered in gold fabric, which were slightly darker than the plush golden carpet that coated the floor. The entire western wall was covered in CD's, mostly classical and jazz. There was a stereo system in the corner that looked incredibly modern. His window overlooked the backyard, too, but it was a slightly less impressive view than Alice's room.

Altogether, it was a major improvement. I recalled the prison-cell of a room that Edward had previously locked himself in, and I couldn't help but feel a surge of pride for Esme and Alice's decorating skills.

"This is… my room?" Edward said uncertainly.

Alice beamed. "You like it?"

"I…." He trailed off, entering the room for the first time. He made his way over to the wall of CDs, reading the names of all of them in record time.

"And there's more!" Alice waltzed over to the music player, pressed a few buttons, and suddenly the room was filled with a luxurious classical composition.

Edward's mouth hung slightly open. "Clair de Lune?" he whispered.

Alice nodded, with a smile so bright it would put the sun to shame.

"I saw that it was your favorite."

Edward stared at her in a way that was becoming astoundingly familiar. Alice was like no one he'd ever known.

Suddenly, he crossed the room in three long strides, taking Alice up into a bone crushing hug.

"Thank you," he whispered fervently into her ear. "It's much more than I deserve."

"It's just what you deserve. And don't forget that Jasper helped too," Alice said.

"Not much," I interrupted quickly. "I followed her when she went shopping."

Edward raised his eyes to mine. "Still, thank you very much, also, Jasper." He raised his hand, and I shook it. Our relationship wasn't perfect, yet, but I had a feeling it would get better.

The rest of the family had come up by this time and were standing behind us. Emmett huffed.

"Don't I get a new room?" he muttered.

Alice spun out of Edward's hug to face him. "Well, no. But you do get another gift."

Emmett's face brightened instantly. I was reminded of a child on Christmas.

"Killer! What is it?"

Alice tugged on his hand, leading him down the stairs. Everyone ran after her. We ended up in the garage.

"YES!" Emmett roared as he spied his gift: a shiny Jeep with a red hardtop. "Now I don't have to take that stupid Volvo everywhere I go!"

Edward frowned. "I like the Volvo."

"Yeah, whatever," Emmett said, rolling his eyes. "Thanks, little sis and little bro!" he said, ruffling Alice's spiky hair. She grinned her incredible grin, taking my hand again.

She turned to Rosalie. "Your gift is in the box," she said, indicating to a large, rectangular object in the middle of the room, a bow attached to the top. Rosalie delicately slid off the wrapping paper, revealing an intricate toolbox.

"I saw that you liked to work on cars," Alice said, the first hint of anxiety I'd ever heard in her voice. "I hope you like it."

To my intense surprise, Rosalie's cold features transformed into a smile.

"I love it, thank you very much."

"Alice and Jasper have already given us our gifts," Esme announced proudly.

Edward raised his eyebrows in surprise as he read the gifts in her thoughts.

"An original version of _Gray's Anatomy_ for me," Carlisle said, his eyes twinkling, "And several real-estate territories for Esme to renovate."

"It was very thoughtful," Esme said, patting my shoulder.

Carlisle put his arm around Esme's shoulders. "Welcome to the family."

And, looking around, I could see that we were a family now. Alice, Esme, Carlisle, Edward, Emmett—even Rosalie, who seemed to be calmed by her mate's acceptance of us. There was a strange feeling in the room, another one that I've never felt before.

Edward looked me in the eye. "Trust," he said, naming the emotion he read in my thoughts. "That's called trust."

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**So, I think I'm going to end it there, because basically things are all good now. **

**But I AM going to do more Jasper stories, so check back to my page if you like them!**

**Also: I'm going to do a bit of advertising here, and say go check out my other stories! Invisible is about two vampires who find the Cullens at probably the worst moment ever, and my newest is called The Hardest Thing, and it's a song/quote mashup with some Edward quotes from New Moon.**

**Have a great Thanksgiving, everyone!  
**


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